You Do Remember Who I Am... Don't You?

I have received a private comment expressing displeasure over my missing Book Review Thursday last week. This potentially ex-trainee seemed to think they might not be the only one who missed out, and wondered if I would like to ask for a show of hands on the issue. They seriously wanted a poll. They wanted to know if the big, bad dominatrix had disappointed her readers. Think that one through for a moment, folks. I will wait while you try and sort that one out.





You have got to be fucking kidding me. I will not be dictated to by the likes of you, maggot. I am not here for your amusement, and I am not here for your pleasure. Your pleasure, so you claim, is to serve. How dare you question my methods. You are a disgrace to submissives everywhere.

I will bare your flesh and administer forty lashes. I will choose a flogger that is a bit more than you can handle. I will land blows with precision and make damned sure that your ribs, your tender wittle wibs, show the welts of my displeasure tomorrow and in the days to come. I know your weakness, fragile one. I know your fear and I will exploit it. You, regardless of what some crappy dom in college told you, are not in control here. I am in control here. And you will like it.

I will fuck you with the handle of my weapon for that little indiscretion. And next time you have a complaint, you best phrase it in the form of a question, bitch. Remember this, if you remember nothing else: There Is No Talking In My Library.

Book Review Thursday - The Black Swan

I think you know by now how much I love smart boys. Mmmmmmmmm. Tasty. She's into malacas, Dino.

This man, Nassim Nicholas Taleb, is sexy. I love to curl up with this book, his masterpiece about the highly improbable thing that will sneak up and bite you on the ass. The Black Swan is a beautiful freak. Gotta love that.

Black Swans are highly unpredictable and improbable events that, when they do occur, change everything. Ever had the impossible happen and change the entire paradigm of your life? Perhaps you were a sweet young thing who had never been hit and then one day your mean bitch of a girlfriend hauled off and slapped you. First you were angry. Then you got a hard on. And you got even angrier about that.

A Black Swan can be the big event that changes the world (like a credit crisis) or a big event that just changes your world. Either way, it changes the game, to borrow an overused phrase from the political pundits of CNN.

Even better than the incredibly geeky/sexy subject matter of math and philosophy: this man can actually put together a coherent sentence! Hooray for the Queen's English! This book makes me hot as a librarian, as a student of history, and as a dominatrix.

Keep it up, all you sexy smart boys who aspire to be like Mr. Taleb. You get the dominant bitches wet. ISBN-13: 978-1400063512 Amazon.com

Book Review Thursday - Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns

This classic by Philip Miller and Molly Devon is a truly "boots on the ground" look at what the subtitle refers to as "the romance and sexual sorcery of sadomasochism." I don't know about sorcery, really, but this book is required reading.

Screw the Roses is a masterful (no pun intended) description of how a BDSM lifestyle relationship can work. The touching tales of how love conquers pain are actually fantastic from the right point of view. An individual hoping to embark on a BDSM journey with a spouse or other loved one simply must read this book. It touches on so many important subjects that can make or break a traditional relationship, and for that it must be worshipped.

However, this is not to be confused with a professional BDSM relationship of any sort. Just as a professional (usually) will not have sex with you, they (usually) won't cuddle after a scene and tell you they love you. I know I won't. You may earn a loving sigh or even a few words of affection, but these things are not rights as they are in other types of relationships. Remember, just as you must do what it takes to earn an engagement ring, you must do what it takes to earn your collar. Don't expect that it will be freely given without something in exchange.

So- as much as I adore this book in a relationship context, please do not read it and expect that your life as a trainee will resemble this in any way. It will not. The dichotomy must stand. For it's intended purpose, though- this book is the best. ISBN-13: 9780964596009 amazon.com

Book Review Thursday - Female Ejaculation and the G Spot

Female Ejaculation and the G Spot, by Deborah Sundahl. Save yourself some heartache and add rubber sheets to your Amazon order when you buy this book. Part fantasy fodder and part what you really hoped to learn in Sex Ed, this book deserves a place in every woman's collection. Leave it out so your partner can find it "accidentally." ISBN-13: 9781904132387 amazon.com